Be A Part Of Your Own Rescue

I have a very small circle of friends. Some of my friends are in relationships that they are unhappy in. The thing that gets me is, if you’re unhappy with something in your life, change it. Stop complaining about your partner and the way they treat you and what they put you through and how they make you feel. As far as I’m concerned, a person can only put you through what you allow them to put you through. If you continue to be abused (mentally, emotionally, physically or financially) it’s only because you are allowing these things to happen to you. You stay in the relationship, hoping things are going to get better and things hardly change.

What kills me about these individuals is the complaining they do. I don’t wanna hear it. Your relationship starts to lose validity in my eyes. You’re arguing today and in love tomorrow but since you’ve told everybody about every spat, everyone knows your happiness is temporary. Pe0ple who really know whats going on, know what it is. What people in these toxic relationships may not realize is, they are doing this to themselves. Why continue to allow yourself to be mistreated? You’re basically giving your partner (or whoever it is mistreating you) the impression that it’s okay to do so. Why continue to stay in a situation where you are unhappy? That’s not living, that’s surviving.

I think people who stay in situations that are detrimental, are putting themselves through pain by staying in that relationship. I went through this myself. I was always trying to fix someone, when I finally realized, I could only fix myself. I still have room for improvement but I’m far from the sad young woman I used to be. I’m no longer afraid to cut people out of my life; if I can recognize that my best interest is not what they have in mind, they’re dismissed. You have two options: You can love me or Leave me alone.

But my job as their friend is not to express my opinion (even though I do sometimes.) My duty is to support them in whatever desicions they make, whether I agree with them or not. And if they fall, be there to pick them up. That’s my definition of a true friend.


You May Want A Little Background Info…

I was born April 1984 in The Bronx, New York. I had a pretty normal childhood, full of great memories. My teenage years were full of rebellion. I experimented with drugs and with crime. I was arrested when I was 18 years old and spending a weekend in Central Bookings was a wake up call for me. I was not about that street life. I decided to go to college and lead an honest life. Once I turned my life around and started living honestly, I realized that what comes around definitely goes around. I went through several situations that were eye-opening to the fact that you can not put negative out into the universe and expect nothing in return. It will catch up to you, sooner or later.

After graduating from BMCC with an Associates degree in Business Management. I started working for a non-profit foster care agency. I then I went to Lehman for my Bachelor’s degree in Psychology. I’m considering going back for my Master’s degree but I’m not sure what my major would be.

I am now at a point in my life where I’d like to be a Counselor or Therapist of some kind. Lots of people volunteer information to me and I believe a big part of that is because they trust me. I take trust very seriously, now. Before I would gossip and tell people’s business and the drama would begin. I Hate Drama. It’s negaitive energy and its wack. So I made the decision to take people trusting me with information, very seriously. My trust has been betrayed a number of times over the years and by numerous people. That’s even more drama, so you can imagine how those situations went.

In saying that, I find it hard to trust people with MY personal business and so I thought, screw it!; I’ll let the whole world know how I feel and what I’m thinking.

I’ve decided to expose myself (mentally and emotionally) that is.