Narcissism is the reason social networks are successful.
Author: Anita
Incredibly Self Aware
On one hand…
I judge. I put my two cents in. I interrupt people while their talking. I gossip (minimally.) I cut people out of my life at the drop of a dime. I’m impatient. I shut down when I’m upset. I stress over little things. I have an ill attitude. I suffer from “Resting Bitch Face.”
On the other hand…
I’m kind. I care. I’m affectionate. I appreciate you. I’m empathetic. I’m driven. I’m honest. I’m independent. I’m dependable. I’m trustworthy. I’m loyal. My word is my bond. I don’t feed into nonsense.
And, if I care about you, you’ll see all of the above traits at some point in time in our relationship (please feel free to add anything I may have missed lol.) I know myself – good, bad and ugly. Keep in mind, The Lord ain’t done with me yet so bare with me.
Big Buns (I Like Em)
Be A Part Of Your Own Rescue
I have a very small circle of friends. Some of my friends are in relationships that they are unhappy in. The thing that gets me is, if you’re unhappy with something in your life, change it. Stop complaining about your partner and the way they treat you and what they put you through and how they make you feel. As far as I’m concerned, a person can only put you through what you allow them to put you through. If you continue to be abused (mentally, emotionally, physically or financially) it’s only because you are allowing these things to happen to you. You stay in the relationship, hoping things are going to get better and things hardly change.
What kills me about these individuals is the complaining they do. I don’t wanna hear it. Your relationship starts to lose validity in my eyes. You’re arguing today and in love tomorrow but since you’ve told everybody about every spat, everyone knows your happiness is temporary. Pe0ple who really know whats going on, know what it is. What people in these toxic relationships may not realize is, they are doing this to themselves. Why continue to allow yourself to be mistreated? You’re basically giving your partner (or whoever it is mistreating you) the impression that it’s okay to do so. Why continue to stay in a situation where you are unhappy? That’s not living, that’s surviving.
I think people who stay in situations that are detrimental, are putting themselves through pain by staying in that relationship. I went through this myself. I was always trying to fix someone, when I finally realized, I could only fix myself. I still have room for improvement but I’m far from the sad young woman I used to be. I’m no longer afraid to cut people out of my life; if I can recognize that my best interest is not what they have in mind, they’re dismissed. You have two options: You can love me or Leave me alone.
But my job as their friend is not to express my opinion (even though I do sometimes.) My duty is to support them in whatever desicions they make, whether I agree with them or not. And if they fall, be there to pick them up. That’s my definition of a true friend.
If You Knew Better, You’d Do Better
If your text includes the phrase “bother you” (i.e. Sorry to bother you or Don’t mean to bother you.) It’s obvious you know you are being a bother; so do yourself a favor and don’t bother sending the text 📵✌️
Cheaters: WINNING!
As you know from earlier posts, I was a cheater in a past life. I AM a good girl now and proud of it. As I sit back and look at the world, I notice that monogamy is uncommon but it’s something that is expected of us. Think about it, have you cheated? Have you gotten cheated on? Know anyone who is monogamous? Are they being cheated on?!? Point is, I’ve been on both sides and they both require discipline. Lots of thinking before acting. When I was a cheater, I would have to strategically plan my moves, how to keep my composure while in the presence of my man, would I have enough control to be able to stay low?, what if my side dude’s sex is better than my main?
There are so many more things you think of when you’re a cheater, it can consume you. You begin living lies while you step out and try to act like it fells natural. I would often feel guilty, disgusted with myself and like a hypocrite! I felt guilty because I had a commitment to my main but I would act like my side dude deserved more than my main, when that is the dumbest thing I could have thought. My main has BEEN down, through all my BS, he held me down. Why would I think another man deserves more than him? Instead of realizing what I had, I was too worried about what I wanted. LAME! And hypocritical because it was okay for me to do it to him but if I found out he had a side chick, I’d feel like I had the right to be upset. Smh
Drake has a song “Doing It Wrong,” you should hear it some time. There is a part in the song when he says,”We live in a generation of not being in love, and not being together. But we sure make it feel like we’re together, cause we’re scared to see each other with somebody else.” When I heard this, I thought it was the realest thing I’d heard in a long time. This is how our generation views relationships, at least Drake and I think so. We stay in relationships we really don’t wanna be in. We are just together, to say we with somebody. Sometimes, we don’t even care about the person we’re with, but we stay; hindering their happiness and our own. Because as cheaters, we’re selfish.
In the same breath, being faithful is difficult for someone who is accustomed to cheating. I have to stay focused on how much I care about my main and how much he deserves from me. I am blessed so I’m focused on mine. But for some reason I feel like there will always be a part of me that is tempted. It’s crazy! I’m in a better relationship now, than I ever thought I deserved. And I finally understand the importance of monogamy and loyalty. Anything short of being monogamous or loyal would be the biggest betrayal to my main; I don’t plan on doing anything to make him feel any less than what he’s worth, priceless.
Dope Building
I want to live in this building.
Land Of The … IDK What
The more injustice I witness, the more I believe we are “Guilty until proven Innocent.”
Can’t Take Those Coins With You
Money is powerful but it’s not everything (to me.) Where I’m from, people live check to check and if they have no idea when that next check is coming, things can get ugly. But in the same breath, they spend their money on things they don’t really need, like the latest sneakers, shoes, purses, clothes or cars – which they can’t afford. I’m amazed and baffled by it all. Why do people with no money want to come off like they have money?! If you don’t have it, make due with what you have because you are going to go broke just to prove a point, you big dummy. You can walk around in $200 sneakers but if you don’t have money in your pocket for the bus or to buy some food, what good are those sneakers?!?
I learned that money is really not that important in my life. I mean, it buys things and helps me pay my bills. But what I’m saying is when I die, nobody’s going to remember how much money I had or how much I spent or what I brought them. We can’t take anything with us when we die. What people will be left with is the memories we created, the stories we told, secrets we shared and bonds we developed. So stop spending money on frivolous things and start investing your time into something that matters because when you really think about it, time is worth so much more than money.
Our Girls
I never realized how important it is to instill values into children as early as possible. Growing up, I did well in school and it was often celebrated when I received my report cards and awards at ceremonies; this gave me pride in my education. My opinion was never asked for or listened to, in my household children were seen and not heard; this made me feel like nothing I said or thought mattered to anyone else and caused me to be introverted. I was never told I was beautiful, so I always felt unworthy of trying to exude beauty; I was a tomboy until I was about 16 years old and wore large clothing to hide my body. When I did start to wear feminine clothing, I received lots of attention. It was nice to finally be acknowledged for something at face value. (I couldn’t wear my academic achievements, so it made me feel good to be recognized as “pretty” for a first impression.) But I didn’t realize that, for some people, the way they look is all that matters and being attractive trumps all. I’ve realized that in the years that I grew up and now, are very different times. I see females showing more of their body, acting provocatively and being careless with their most prized possessions. This makes me question whether they know their worth.
Actually, the answer to that question is quite clear, they have no idea what they are worth because they haven’t been shown to value themselves. In my opinion, it’s important for girls to know that they are intelligent, capable and worthwhile. They also need to be taught that it is important to be conscious of the way they present themselves. I’m not saying that they shouldn’t be allowed to wear what they want without being judged, I’m saying they should be taught to identify the difference between someone who wants their body and someone who appreciates their intelligence, personality, opinions and values.
As the adults in their lives, it’s up to us to help our girls understand this. I talk to young girls as much as I can, stressing the importance of education and professional drive. As well as the importance of keeping themselves safe, when it comes to sex. I sometimes feel like it’s not my place to talk to them about such things but if they’ve never heard anything like that before, maybe I can help one of them realize that they are priceless and their worth is unmeasured.
Versus
There are two kinds of people in this world, iPhone users and Galaxy users.
That is all.
But You Say He’s Just A Friend
I don’t believe in platonic relationships between opposite sexes. This pertains to new friends, not friends you’ve known since you were a child. Once you’re in your 30’s, your “friend” of the opposite sex has a tendency of becoming a bit more attractive, there’s a little more sexual tension and some jealousy transpires. I don’t have ANY “friends” that are male. It’s been my experience that males who I thought were my friends, at some point confessed they wanted to become romantically involved with me or I wanted to with them (lol, I’m no angel.) Thing is, it never seems to work out. While you were friends, you talked about people you’ve met, situations you’ve been in and relationships formed. This gives the person a preconceived notion of who you are and what you are capable of, in a relationship. These notions are then all that person thinks about when you become involved romantically and it’s held against you. I personally feel like friends shouldn’t become lovers and lovers can’t become friends. Once you’ve had sex, you’ve relinquished your relationship as friends. After sex, you’ve crossed a line of no return.
I could be wrong.
Today’s Fortune
Words I live by.
My Screenshot
This is my screenshot. It’s my lock screen and it’s things that I want to keep in mind on a daily basis. It’s purpose is to keep me positive and focused. It’s said that if you are reminded of your goals daily, you are more likely to accomplish them. We’ll see what happens 😁.
I often wonder what others screensaver’s signify. It’s kind of invasive but at least I can admit to my faults.
Just Know
Your insecurities reveal themselves through your actions
Yellow Cupcake 