Some recognition.

Shout out to every pen pal I ever had.

A message to whoever may need it:

Words have power, so watch your fucking mouth.

What kind of world are we living in?!

Where the President of the United States, uses him contracting the virus during a global pandemic; as a rollout for the election!? Wtf is going on here? 👀

I’m TIRED! (and I know I’m not the only one)

Someone once called me the “trunk of my family tree;” it meant that I was the foundation that balanced everyone in my family. I am The Fixer. With this title came great pride, optimism and pressure. I felt that if I could help everyone else with their stuff, I would feel fulfilled. That however, is not the case. It’s quiet the contrary; I feel drained, like I am not taking enough care of myself and as much as I give, I can’t catch a break. I try to stay positive and see the brighter side of things rather than focus on anything negative. So I thought to myself, “what do I need to feel better?”

Mercy is what I need. I am a strong, smart, independent and I usually will ask for help when I need it. At this point, I need support; emotional and metal support. This blog is sort of like therapy for me, I can be who I am and feel free in doing so without feeling judged. I have a tendency to let things build up in me and then I explode. At the same time, I don’t like to talk about these things with the people I am close with because I don’t want them to worry about me. This is something that many people I know, do. Life is tough enough, I don’t want to burden others with my shit! That leaves me looking for an outlet to express myself and lately, the things that have been going on in this world have me feeling down. But I remind myself to be grateful for who & what I do have in my life. And when you give love, you get love ❤️

As down as I feel, I still have to drive to care for and nurture my fellow man. And the things that I am witnessing right now have me hurting. Injustice, lack of compassion, lack of empathy, lack of understanding, lack of knowledge, it’s all overwhelming.

So as someone, somewhere, going through something; as you read this just know, everything is going to be alright. Things will get better. Someone, somewhere cares about you. You are special, you are important, you are loved. Sending you SO much love xo

Life

Yesterday was my 35th birthday. I had a blast and also realized that I don’t “feel” 35. I feel like a green newbie to this thing called life. But that’s the feeling I LOVE! I love exploring and discovering new things; I enjoy being out of my comfort zone because it pushes me think outside of the box. For me, life has been one amazing surprise after another, and for that I am so grateful. What I have learned is not to question my circumstances, always do my best and always be grateful. Thank you 🙏🏽

We Need Love

In my evolution, I’ve learned; the most important thing in life is love. Love does indeed conquer all. With love, nothing is impossible. When I am filled with love; I feel no fear, no doubt, no grief. I get the most love from my daughter. She gives me the purest love I’ve ever felt. She takes care of me, she wipes my tears when I cry and does everything in her power to lift my spirits. Whenever I feel down, I think of her sweet gestures and I smile. My heart feels like it glows. I feel like I can do anything. I am filled with hope, peace and happiness.

In today’s society, there is little love present. It’s the most negative things that get the most attention. While positivity is found few and far between. Trolls rule the internet, media and our country. This shit is a disgrace. SMH but I have to remain hopeful for the future, for the sake of my daughter. Sure, she’s tough lol but the way society functions today; can easily make people sad, depressed and hopeless. But if you are reading this, please have faith, give love and be grateful. Spread Love 💕 The positive energy needs to drown out the negative. Because in the negative overpowering the positive, we’re screwed.

We need a revolution. A revolution of Love.

God help us

If Trump arms teachers with guns, that will be the beginning of “the Purge.” 😳🤯

(I just watched this video and 👆🏽that thought came to mind immediately)

I Understand

Sometimes I struggle to find the hole for my earring. Now I know how some dudes feel when they struggle to find the hole 🤔

I Appreciate You

Shout out to everyone who has ever hurt me. Thank you to everyone who doubted me. Without you, I wouldn’t be as strong as I am today. You prepared me for the callus world we live in. You forced me to develop the self confidence I now have. You forced me to be my own biggest fan.  You made me love myself when I thought it was your love that would make me feel whole. You made me great. I appreciate you.

Looking Outside of Myself 

I sit today with a heavy heart. There have been a number of natural disasters in the last few weeks; Hurricane Harvey, Irma and Maria as well as a devastating Earthquake in Mexico. The hurricanes have left some places uninhabitable. The severity of the human condition should be apparent, people need our help. No matter the color of your skin or your beliefs, we need to help each other.

I am often the “annoying” friend, encouraging people to recycle for the betterment of our Mother Earth; or reminding people that they shouldn’t leave the faucet running because there are people on this Earth who don’t have the luxury of running water at their fingertips. Now, more than ever, I have to advocate for my fellow human beings.

I urge anyone who reads this to donate time, clothes, food or money (anything you can,) to help our fellow man. What’s happening to people going through these disasters, could happen to any one of us or someone we love. Just because we don’t know these people’s names, faces or history; doesn’t mean they are any less human.

I’ve written before, about how important it is to care for our Mother Earth, as she provides all we need to survive. It seems as though, she’s pretty pissed off and she’s letting us know through these events. I think the message she is trying to convey is that, we need to take care of her and take care of each other. We often walk around in our own worlds, oblivious to what is effecting others. We can no longer afford to walk around self absorbed. If our “leaders” are not willing to acknowledge the devastation and need to support each other, than we need to think for ourselves and encourage unity.

Apology accepted.

In order for me to accept your apology, it has to include some variation of one of the following words: 

Sorry, Regret, Remorse, Apologize.

Pardon My Ignorance 

It has somehow become acceptable in society to be rude & immoral. It has some sort of an intriguing effect on people.

I was brought up to be kind and respectful to others. Watching humans treat each other unjust makes me angry and confused. Listening to the pointless arguments and bigotry is disappointing.

We need to do better because things are progressively getting worse.

Peace ☮️ & Love 💟

I Do My Dirt All By My Lonely 

Let me start by saying, I do not share my personal business with anyone. It’s nothing personal, it’s just I’ve learned from past experiences that sharing personal your personal business will get you judged, be held against you and/or make your personal business the topic of others conversation. All of these things have happened to me before and made me come to the conclusion that: I just don’t trust people!

That being said, people often have no idea what gripes I’m dealing with in my life. I am the type of person to let you unload all your mess on me and I just listen. I DO NOT repeat what I’m told so it all just accumulates inside of my chest and mind. Lately, I’ve been having a few people dump their mess on me and I’m feeling quite overwhelmed. I’m feeling like a huge pile of 💩. I listen to people’s drama and problems and talk with them about how to alleviate their issues but mine stay in the dark, under a cover in the back of my mind. Slowly, my anger and anxiety have grown and I think I’ve reached a point where I need to cut myself off from these people and handle my own issues. 

A part of me feels guilty for feeling this way.  Abandoning the people who depend on me as a listening ear and selfishly handling things for myself as they continue in their woes. I feel a sense of responsibility for other human beings and their well being. I’m not sure if that makes me a saint or a sucker.